My Bestie was married – and then she was not – so I decided to host a Divorce Party for her; it simply is, what good friends should do. This isn’t a sad story. My friend married a great guy but like so many relationships and for so many different reasons – it just didn’t work out and there was no happily ever after.
Breakups, divorce and partings aren’t great tragedies – yes they’re sad and yes they do hurt (often a lot.) But my personal view is that all relationships need to grow and evolve or else they will and should end. Tragic, is staying in a relationship because it’s easy and not having the courage to walk away when you’re both fucking miserable.
Sorry kids, but there’s no special prize for being and staying in an unhappy relationship.
We happily celebrate engagements, weddings and anniversaries. They’re so optimistic and filled with a fresh sense of hope. But nothing lasts forever and nothing stays the same. Remember that all things – relationships included – seek to evolve; and it’s naive to think they won’t.
Instead of shaming, pitying and saying “Oh that’s so sad” to the next Divorcee lets start applauding the good parts of the relationship; what they learnt, how they grew and then celebrating what comes next.
And yes friends, this includes hosting a Divorce Party.
“Divorce, it seems, has turned into a party — special cakes and all. Event planners, bakers, lawyers and academics note the rise of “divorce parties” over the last several years, many with cakes featuring weapon-wielding brides or gloomy black frosting on inverted tiers.” – Leanne Italie, Huffington Post
We didn’t have any “weapon-wielding brides” or “gloomy black frosting,” but we did have a vagina cake instead!
I wanted the night to symbolise new beginnings and celebrations. I contemplated building a giant vagina sculpture and pushing my freshly divorced Bestie out of the symbolic birth canal but laziness and my lack of paper mache dexterity got the better of me and I opted for cake instead.
Breaking up, getting divorced, moving on – fark it’s so hard right? I have so much empathy, love and compassion for anyone who’s in that space right now.
Divorce parties don’t have to be tacky or woo-woo (cakes excluded). We skipped the goddess cards, games and intention setting rituals for a local bar, where we could all stuff our faces with wine, pizza and vagina cake to show our friend how much we love and how much we support her.
If one of your Besties, Friends or Family is going through a rough patch it’s time to reach out and show them a little more love, care and support… please feel free to email me for vagina cake instructions.
In total transparency; I’m shit-house when it comes to baking so my beautiful friend J made the cake and I just helped with the icing. Thoughts?
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